hoochie kissers.

Here's the thing about boys: they constantly screw up what they really want for something they don't really want, but also don't care to say no to. And if that introductory statement was confusing to you, I'll attempt to clarify all confusion by sharing an example...

Boy loves girl. Girl loves boy. But girl is uncertain of boy's feelings for her. And boy, well, he's just not being patient. Or open. Or honest, I suppose. And so he runs around ruining all his chances with the girl that he really loves because he is just too afraid to man up and tell her how he feels. And instead, he uses his charm and his lovely smile to woo other, innocent and unsuspecting girls into loving him, and then he kisses them and runs. So here he is, kissing lots of girls, but wanting only one girl, while the one girl he loves is getting hurt by his nonsensical shenanigans, and therefore vows she will never allow herself to fall for him, which ultimately hurts him and causes him to go even crazier. So like, it's a mess, right? And if he'd just STOP long enough to tell the girl he loves that he loves her, then she'd love him back and everyone would be happy. Well, aside from the hearts of poor girls he broke along the way. 

Why do guys do that? Why do they love one girl, but yet allow themselves to live their lives smooching hoochies and breaking the hearts of innocent girls who were unaware of their selfish games, and not actually love the girl they love? Because guys are just as confused as girls are when it comes to love.

We're all crazy. 

and I hate it.

My advice? Don't love him until he's ready to love you the right way. It's not worth the heartache.

No more love songs.

And so there I found myself, sitting on my couch, listening to a sappy love song feeling lonely when suddenly I thought, "Nah." 

And that was that.  

Winky Faces and Awful Pick-up Lines.

Why is it that guys think if they repeatedly insult you, you'll fall for them? I don't know about you, but when a guy is all, "Hey baby. I just want your body." and he accents it with an awful winky face, the only person I want falling is him... off a cliff. Also, quick side-note: the winky face, when used in texting, is basically the awkwardly magical symbol that makes everything sensual. A guy can say something really sweet, but as soon as he adds a wink to the end of it, I can't help but to assume he's being perverted. In my mind, there is a big difference between, "Hey, what are you doing?" and "Hey, what are you doing? ;)" 

I've heard my fair share of suggestive comments uttered from the mouths of men- my tip of the day? Don't put up with it. Honestly, there are too many guys out there who throw out what they think are "compliments" just because they "want your body." Be patient enough to wait for the guy who tells you you're beautiful and thinks you're absolutely brilliant. Because I promise, he's out there. But you won't find him if you've settled for the guy with crude words and thoughts to match.  And when a guys does throw out a heinous collection of words that is more insulting than complimentary, tell him off. It will only help him in the long run.

"Hey baby, I want your body."

"Oh yeah? Well you know what I want? I want you to shut up unless you can talk to me like I'm an actual woman, not some kind of chew toy. Ever heard of class? Well, you should look into it, because you could use a little in your life."  

Guys need to be whipped into shape every now and then. Plus, it's refreshing to them when a girl actually knows what she wants and doesn't put up with their crap.

Welcome.

Hi, I'm She, and I've been in a variety of relationships. Some were wonderful, some were okay, and some were just flat out obnoxious. But that being said, I've become familiar with the functions of many different brains that have been located within the skulls of several different males. Therefore, I now consider myself a highly qualified man-tamer. 

This blog is for females everywhere and anywhere-- guys are insolent creatures with a tendency to act without using the valuable god-given tool that we like to refer to as the brain. Women, however, have the tendency to over-use their brains. Talk about polar opposites.

I'm here to morph awful relationships and horrible situations into a form of entertainment. I'll share my horrendous men-related experiences with the world so females everywhere can learn from my life lessons instead of having to endure similar situations to figure it out on their own. Feel free to laugh aloud or scream in utter disgust. 

Hi, I'm She, and I'm the man-tamer.